emotional constipation.
a conversation late into last night brought about some thoughts..
an excerpt from The Zahir by Paulo Coelho:
"I apologize for not being as direct as the other 2 previous speakers, but nevertheless I have something to say. I went to a train station today and learned that the distance between railway tracks is always 143.5cm or 4 feet 8 1/2 inches. Why this absurd measurement? I asked my girlfriend to find out and this is what she discovered. When they built the first train carriages, they used the same tools as they had for building horse drawn carriages. And why that distance between the wheels on the carriages? Because that was the width of the old roads along which the carriages had to travel. And who decided that rails should be that width? ....... It was the Romans, the first great road builders, who decided to make their roads that width. And why? Because their war chariots were pulled by 2 horses, when placed side by side took up 143.5cm.
So the distance between the tracks I saw today, used by our state of the art high speed trains was determined by the Romans. When the people went to the United States and started building railways there, it didn't occur to them to change the width and so it stayed as it was. This even affected the building of the space shuttles. American engineers thought the fuel tanks should be wider, but the tanks were built in Utah and had to transported by train the to Space Centre in Florida, and the tunnels couldn't take anything wider. And so they had to accept that the measurement the Romans had decided was ideal. But what has all this got to do with love or marriage?
....
It has everything to do with marriage and with the 2 stories we just heard. At some point in history, someone turned up and said: when 2 people get married, they must stay frozen like that for the rest of their lives. You will move along side by side like 2 tracks,keeping always the same distance apart. Even if sometimes one of you needs to be a little further or closer, that is against the rules. ... You cant change, you must be like the 2 railway tracks that remain the same distance apart all the way from their point of departure to their destination. The rules don't allow for love to change, or to grow at the start and diminish halfway through. It's too dangerous. And so, after the enthusiasm of the first few years, they maintain the same distance, the same solidity, the same functional nature.
...
Smile in all the photos. Put the photos in the living room, so that everyone can see them. Cut the grass, practice a sport. When sport is not enough, have plastic surgery. But never forget, these rules were established long ago and must be respected. Who established these rules? That doesn't matter. Don't question them, because they will always apply, even if you don't agree with them."
I'm no cynic on love. I'm what you even could call an old time romantic.
but it seems love, much as everything else, already has the boundaries set many many years ago. who said flowers made great gifts? why do we still buy girls chocolates even though they constantly whine about their weight? is there really any thought in the things that we do, or do we just do them because the boundaries, the rules have already been laid? how many times someone tell you," I love you." and because you simply have no better response and although you don't really know if you love the person...you simply reply the same.
how do you really know?
an excerpt from The Zahir by Paulo Coelho:
"I apologize for not being as direct as the other 2 previous speakers, but nevertheless I have something to say. I went to a train station today and learned that the distance between railway tracks is always 143.5cm or 4 feet 8 1/2 inches. Why this absurd measurement? I asked my girlfriend to find out and this is what she discovered. When they built the first train carriages, they used the same tools as they had for building horse drawn carriages. And why that distance between the wheels on the carriages? Because that was the width of the old roads along which the carriages had to travel. And who decided that rails should be that width? ....... It was the Romans, the first great road builders, who decided to make their roads that width. And why? Because their war chariots were pulled by 2 horses, when placed side by side took up 143.5cm.
So the distance between the tracks I saw today, used by our state of the art high speed trains was determined by the Romans. When the people went to the United States and started building railways there, it didn't occur to them to change the width and so it stayed as it was. This even affected the building of the space shuttles. American engineers thought the fuel tanks should be wider, but the tanks were built in Utah and had to transported by train the to Space Centre in Florida, and the tunnels couldn't take anything wider. And so they had to accept that the measurement the Romans had decided was ideal. But what has all this got to do with love or marriage?
....
It has everything to do with marriage and with the 2 stories we just heard. At some point in history, someone turned up and said: when 2 people get married, they must stay frozen like that for the rest of their lives. You will move along side by side like 2 tracks,keeping always the same distance apart. Even if sometimes one of you needs to be a little further or closer, that is against the rules. ... You cant change, you must be like the 2 railway tracks that remain the same distance apart all the way from their point of departure to their destination. The rules don't allow for love to change, or to grow at the start and diminish halfway through. It's too dangerous. And so, after the enthusiasm of the first few years, they maintain the same distance, the same solidity, the same functional nature.
...
Smile in all the photos. Put the photos in the living room, so that everyone can see them. Cut the grass, practice a sport. When sport is not enough, have plastic surgery. But never forget, these rules were established long ago and must be respected. Who established these rules? That doesn't matter. Don't question them, because they will always apply, even if you don't agree with them."
I'm no cynic on love. I'm what you even could call an old time romantic.
but it seems love, much as everything else, already has the boundaries set many many years ago. who said flowers made great gifts? why do we still buy girls chocolates even though they constantly whine about their weight? is there really any thought in the things that we do, or do we just do them because the boundaries, the rules have already been laid? how many times someone tell you," I love you." and because you simply have no better response and although you don't really know if you love the person...you simply reply the same.
how do you really know?
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